Tasked

BA6D101F-43AB-49C0-85DA-86C4A1B54316
Gold hoops, sparkled shoulders, full length fur conspire to make a Ford F-150 aspire to limousine level revelry.
4740FB50-797E-4CEF-B5E9-45E407F07857
Boots provide a crucial nod to modesty – quite necessary when form fitting and short are together in one dress.  Also better for cold weather, with lace tights layered over plain black hosiery.
0A6D24ED-6358-4072-AD6C-35BB01BCC809
For additional poise/modesty when wearing tight plus bling, the high neckline and half-length sleeves assist. I also secure much confidence by courting foolishness, such as taking selfies in the bathroom with trash cans as scenery.
8BC2DA48-1828-4A56-9CA1-5E8DD57987A9
Four pieces of gum, many bubbles.

I was thinking about how it takes so much effort to deescalate the intense emotional power of remembered images that recall the darkest regrets in life.  My own struggles are indelibly linked to my mother’s passing. I was thinking how I’ve labored mightily to not let those mental flashes ignite the insistent burn of guilt, on to self-hatred, on to the immolation of light that is ultimately unoptional.  I have mostly come out the other side of that lowest, but potent images lurk and tempt to upend hard fought equanimity.

The notion of labor in reference to mental interiority got me thinking about the actual labor of childbirth.  I’ve had three homebirths, and in comparison, those physical labors are much more about ease.  Though there are some interesting parallels with the contrasts.  So, I wrote a poem about it:

 

I’ve labored long hours

for literal movements

of lives unbound, grown beyond

my interior holding.  Those births

contain the pain

refusing complaint

too forcefully focused

breathing the deepest waves

to overcome.

Figurative labor strains,

brain coaxed to reveal

breaths beyond that wretched last

of entirety gone,

your voice and our womb.

so hard the clutch regret

searing loathsomeness

a mind carefully eyed

might refuse a haunting

to insist upon delivery.

 

 

Advertisements

2 Comments Add yours

  1. Came here for the poetry, stayed for the fashionable outfits!
    StephenDiagram | https://stephendiagram.com/

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s